Yeah, we all pretty much knew who Ira Glass was for a while, but then when he gets his TV show, we're all like wow, he looks just like Mo Rocca, which is, umm, who cares...

BUT! From what I've seen on the side of a bus, ominous news is coming. Somehow someone recently went from squeakily looking like this to lazily looking like that:












Unlike the NPR and VH1 pedigrees of these predecessors, despite its eponymous "I", the IFC is not nearly indie enough to counterbalance all those former years at MTV. Thus, Gideon Yago is obviously a tool, and the Ira Glass thing is now "a look". And, I'm not suggesting that any white guy in black rimmed glasses and shaggy dark fair would look like that. I mean, look at Rivers Cuomo for instance. See? No, it's a look that is somehow being cultivated.

Yeah, this is bad news...




(also, these dudes are all each about a decade apart from each other... I'm kinda freaked out)

BRO TIP:
The morning after a long coke addled night of love making... don't snort any mysterious powder you find next to your lover... It could end up just being deodorant flakes and that shit stings like a motherfucker.



And Davey D... No comment... no commnet. On another note im glad to see you are posting more and prescheduling posts.... very classy San Diego.

Bro Tip:

If you meet a random Polish immigrant on the street who offers you a free beer in a nearby alley way... don't take it! You could get stopped by the police and ticketed for an open container or worse you could get killed!

The saddest of the sads right now, bros, the woest of woes...

We might remember how David Wells pitched a perfect game while he was drunk or hungover or something normal like that about 10 years ago, but that's nothing compared to how Dock Ellis pitched a no-hitter while on acid in 1970.

And of course a couple of years later, just to prove a point he tried to hit every single member of the Cincinnati Reds, and was somehow not pulled until after FIVE batters. I mean, who among us has ever held a baseball and not thought about how flipping sweet it would be to throw it 90mph at every member of the Cincinnati Reds? I wish I could do that all the time...

And now, he is gone. Lame is the sports world without him... He died of cirrhosis of all things, and god bless America, he didn't have health insurance. Vat a country!

As a side note, how awesome is how his name appears in a boxscore, "Ellis, D"... say it outloud, now... yup, a truly badass bro. Definitely a spot for him up in Bro Pitcher Heaven right next to Tug McGraw

Somebody seems to think they have the original Bro Log!

We need to get over to that do-gooder's blogspot and tell him and his unreadable red font to take a hike. Apparently he's unaware that a REAL Bro Log has nothing to do with social justice. A Bro Log is for inane ranting and links to porn. We need to start a crusade to have our Bro Log show up first when you Google the words "Bro" and "Log." We need to show up on the first page when you Google "Bro!"

Now, I have no idea how to do that because computers are for assholes but if we can find someone to do this for us, we will control the brogosphere

As that relentless curmudgeon DaveyD has already pointed out, yes, Jurassic Park may be on the verge of becoming real (and who here doesn't want to get some Thinking Machines Super Computers and talking DNA helixes that eerily foreshadow the MS Office paperclip?) but you know what is real?

Stupid Effin' Face/Off. I know, I know, some of you might've liked the movie, but I think it sucked serious ass-mar. I mean, c'mon... Johnny T has like 7 inches and 40 pounds on little Nicky Cappola, but oh, they just changed faces? Oh, OK, problem solved, their faces are the same. And now these French schmucks have made it possible. Or maybe they were Americans, and the lady without the face who got a new face was French. Either way, these people are jerks and we're one step closer to things not ever ending, kinda like the way Face/Off kept going and going, and oh look! Now we're chasing each other on boats!!

Why can't I get scientific news that forbodes a future I really want? You know, something Bro-Tastic, like if the President of Madison Hotels wants to retire but in order for his son to inherit the company he has to recomplete first through twelfth grades in only 24 weeks?

Oh, and Laura Dern stepping in shit! Dammit, why is that the sucky movies always become real?

Bro Tip:
When using a cherry flavored condom, know that your junk and hands will smell like cherry for a week. No amount of showering, smoking, or febreze-ing can hide this fruity/rubbery stench. So just don't be all surprised if the smell follows you home or to the next town over!